Question:
What do you think of my Poem?
A MAGNUM OPUS
The mystifying smile on your pink lips
Like a great painting on the museum wall
Makes me wonder, as I sit across and observe
Several layers cloaked in your delicate smile
Composed by Rishikaysh Patanckar
⩠2006. Rishikaysh Patanckar. A Magnum Opus, Poem.
Additional Details7 months ago
What about this version?
A MAGNUM OPUS
The mystifying smile on your rosy lips
Like a great painting on the museum wall
Makes me wonder, as I sit across and observe
As little by little, I learn about the invisible
Several layers cloaked in your delicate smile
Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
hmm, I think you need to think about the rhythme of your poem. But besides that, quite deep, quite good.