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Question: Do you like my OTHER poem!? BE HONEST PLEASE!.!?
Tomorrow
Hello!. Last night I layed awake
just to think of you without disturbance!.
I cherish you, with every single step you take!.
Tomorrow will start with a perfect ten!.
Tomorrow I will see you and be in your arms
just to be able to breath again!.
The bell rang once more!.
I will meet you here the next day!.
But I did not!. Thats when my heart tore!.
I started the day over again, by a five
because I am not a ten without you!.
Tell me, how can I possibly survive
without having your loving touch, here!.
Goodbye, I said!. I can't hold on!.
I jumped, from the lonley fear!.
Tomorrow you will feel the emptiness I did!.
Because you know I won't be back!.
I love you, kid!.Www@QuestionHome@Com


Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
did i like your other poem!? - dunno!.!.ill check it out and comment

as for this one!.!.

i enjoyed it!.!.!.but maybe changing

"But i did not" to "But i didn't" i think tht would help with the meter more

all else is gerat, well done :)

lovely poem :DWww@QuestionHome@Com

I like it!. You must like someone a lot ;-)!. Lol, anyway I was thinking maybe not have in "I love you, kid" take away the kid!. Try it out and see if that's what you were looking for or not!. Good job!.

And btw, poetry comes from the soul so it will always be good!.Www@QuestionHome@Com