We all search for positive cues from people around us!. These cues reinforce in us certain behaviour patterns!. There is nothing special in the fact that the narcissist-celebrity does the same!. However there are two major differences between the narcissistic and the normal personality!.
The first is quantitative!. The normal person is likely to welcome a moderate amount of attention – verbal and non-verbal – in the form of affirmation, approval, or admiration!. Too much attention, though, is perceived as onerous and is avoided!. Destructive and negative criticism is avoided altogether!.
The narcissist, in contrast, is the mental equivalent of an alcoholic!. He is insatiable!. He directs his whole behaviour, in fact his life, to obtain these pleasurable titbits of attention!. He embeds them in a coherent, completely biased, picture of himself!. He uses them to regulates his labile (fluctuating) sense of self-worth and self-esteem!.
To elicit constant interest, the narcissist projects on to others a confabulated, fictitious version of himself, known as the False Self!. The False Self is everything the narcissist is not: omniscient, omnipotent, charming, intelligent, rich, or well-connected!.
The narcissist then proceeds to harvest reactions to this projected image from family members, friends, co-workers, neighbours, business partners and from colleagues!. If these – the adulation, admiration, attention, fear, respect, applause, affirmation – are not forthcoming, the narcissist demands them, or extorts them!. Money, compliments, a favourable critique, an appearance in the media, a sexual conquest are all converted into the same currency in the narcissist's mind, into "narcissistic supply"!.
So, the narcissist is not really interested in publicity per se or in being famous!. Truly he is concerned with the REACTIONS to his fame: how people watch him, notice him, talk about him, debate his actions!. It "proves" to him that he exists!.
Www@QuestionHome@Com